Pigs & Fishes > Filks > Mike Rubin's Filks > Fire & Ice Con
This Section (Filks): Index | Mike Rubin's filks
Other Sections: Natter (Latest) | Links (Weblog) | Good Stuff | Geek | Games | Misc.

Fire & Ice Con

Lyrics © 1987 Michael Rubin
Tune: "Daddy's Little Girl" by Julia Ecklar


Boskone Twenty-Four was cursed before the start
Friday the 13th and a full moon.
The concom should have prayed unto the elemental gods
Catastrophe was sure to happen soon.
For the god of ice sent weather that was cold as Dante's Hell
And the god of fire sent out his clarion call through the hotel [bleep bleep bleep bleep...]

The alarms they sounded fire every hour of the night
Fire, fire, fire, though there was no fire in sight.
And drunks and pyros joined in when they heard those siren calls
Stole extinguishers from off the walls
And played the fire hoses in the halls.

The day was spent indoors, it was ten degrees outside
Wind chill down to minus twenty-four.
The pipes they froze and burst in the underground garage
Flooding out the dealers' room next door.
A polar bear or penguin would have found the weather cool;
The fans from Montreal were skinny-dipping in the pool...

The alarms they sounded fire every hour of the night
Fire, fire, fire, though there was no fire in sight.
But every time a window closed the heat rise was so quick
From 10 to 90 'cause the crowd was thick
The fire detector relays all would click.

Some brave conventioneers find a twit with a cigar
Smoking underneath the smoke alarm.
We do not wish to wake the other fen upon this floor
Or have this fellow sue for mental harm.
We think that we have found a way of dealing with this nut
No, we can't defenestrate him 'cause the window's frozen shut!

The alarms they sounded fire every hour of the night
Fire, fire, fire, though there was no fire in sight.
And if that Sheraton don't like us we won't fight a duel
We just won't do business with those fools
SF fans will not play by their damn rules.

The alarms they sounded fire every hour of the night
Fire, fire, fire, though there was no fire in sight.
And drunks and pyros joined in when they heard those siren calls
Stole extinguishers from off the walls
And played the fire hoses in the halls.

Pigs & Fishes > Filks > Mike Rubin's Filks > Fire & Ice Con
This Section (Filks): Index | Mike Rubin's filks
Other Sections: Natter (Latest) | Links (Weblog) | Good Stuff | Geek | Games | Misc.

Contents ©1996-2018 Avram Grumer (avram@grumer.org)
Last updated: Wed, 31 Dec 1969, 04:00 PM EST